Once you understand that people have different love languages—the next step is to discover your own language and the languages of those you love. You can do that by going to 5lovelanguages.com and taking the quiz. Or, you can also ask yourself the following questions:
“How do I typically express love and appreciation to other people?”
“What do I complain about most often?”
“What do I request of people most often?”
If you put the answers to these questions together, I think you’ll discover your primary love language. Once you know it and that of the people you care about, then it’s a matter of choosing to speak the love language of the other person. And, if they reciprocate, then the emotional climate of your relationship will be dramatically enhanced.
Here are your practical suggestions for speaking the love languages this week:
Words of Affirmation:
Make a point to affirm your spouse five separate times today, for things big and small. “You are a wonderful mother to our children,” “your hair looks really nice today,” or “I appreciate the positive outlook you have on life”—anything is fair game!
ACTS OF SERVICE:
Take responsibility for something you don’t normally do around your home—maybe you aren’t normally on laundry duty or the dishwasher crew. This week, make it your responsibility! Give your spouse a week off and tell them you want to serve them because of your love. It will be appreciated.
You can grow up in lots of ways, but there’s some things you should never outgrow. Buy your mom flowers and deliver them to her this week. You’re never too old to show your mother a little extra appreciation.
Think of someone you love who lives far away, and make a point of “spending time” with them this week. Set up a Skype or phone call and make a few minutes to catch up on each other’s lives—it takes extra intentionality to love people over long distances!
Create fun ways to incorporate physical touch with your children—maybe come up with a secret handshake to congratulate them, or a special way you always hug them goodnight.